My blog hates me
Why is it when I post a long overdue and overlong entry haloscan goes invisible?
It's a sign.
I shouldn't update.
Or have verbal diarrhoea.
What can I say? Plenty, as long as I don't have to write it down.
You know that constipated feeling you get, when you know you've got a lot to 'produce' but when you do get to the porcelain receptacle barely anything comes out? That, apparently, is analogous to what I'm feeling right....now.
I have a lot to say, I really do- months and months of inner monologues and nonsensical thoughts, months of telling myself (I'm a narcissist, our best conversation partners are normally our own goodselves) 'Hmm, interesting potential blog topic'- but when I get the the 'new entry here' box, there is...nothing. Inspiration has gone out the window. The muse don't live here no more (if it ever did). And so I am left again, with a list (did I tell you how much I heart lists?)of potential blog topics I have thought about- mostly whilst ensconced on the porcelain throne- but will probably never see the light of day because they're either (1) hopelessly out-of-date; or (more likely) (2) the particular train of thought left me at the station wondering where my ticket went.
These potential blog topics are, in no particular order:-
Topic 1. Malaysian politicians- smarter than your average bear? Sure, if said bear underwent a lobotomy:
Always good for a laugh and/or rant, depending on the alignment of the stars and current average IQ level of Parliament. Whenever I am about to feel optimistic about the state of the nation I read the 'From the Dewan Rakyat' sections in the papers. I feel so happy that we're represented by a bunch of people whose chief mode of debate is name-calling. That, and daring other people to 'be a jantan'. Bad enough that the ones with principles resign, add an ex-leader with pseudo-Lee Kuan Yew syndrome and you have the greatest political satire ever made. Except tragically, it's real life.
And for those of you who are possibly going, "You think you so clever, meh? Being sarcastic and everything...why don't you do something about it?":
Dudes, I spend a large portion of my life 'doing something about it'. AND I pay taxes. With actual money. So I think I deserve to bitch about the fact that the person representing me in government is at best, harmless, and at worst, a blithering idiot out for the quickest buck possible at the expense of our lives; and that I have to vote him in because he was the lesser of two evils.
However, whenever something happens that is particularly blog-worthy, so many people would have written about it already that there simply is no point in me adding to the hubbub. So erm, better to read everyone else.
2. Malaysians are rude and everyone quoted in the papers are in denial about it:
I don't know about the people from Reader's Digest, or the people quoted in the papers, but I absolutely love it when I get pushed in the LRT station because I'm a nano-second too slow in taking out my Touch n' Go card. And speaking of the LRT, is the general population in KL (as represented by LRT commuters- of whom there are a lot of) slowly turning grey? I mean, I can accept the healthy men sitting down on their fat arses who refuse to get up for pregnant ladies, kids and old people by feigning sleep, but people turning grey and looking miserable does not a good start to the day make.
And yes, Reader's Digest, it is too much to expect cashiers in KL to say thank you, much less, smile. Nowadays when I find a cashier who deigns to actually tell me the amount I'm supposed to pay, instead of gesturing at the cashier screen with her Eyes of Apathy, I am so grateful for our Berbudi Bahasa culture. No, really.
And service industry people, particularly in relatively high-end shops and restaurants: When you are about to tell a customer that the product that they asked for is not available, it wouldn't hurt to say sorry. It's just an extra word that comes before your "Don't have". And you don't even have to smile because God knows the effort of using that many muscles isn't worth the measly pay. By the way, when someone has to pay more than RM20 for an entree, that customer would expect the person serving him/her to at least know what's on the menu and what's available, instead of being told 20 minutes later that it's not available.
Then again, according to the Reader's Digest the most polite city is New York so I think it's reasonable to question their research methodology a bit.
Topic 3: My daughter surreptitiously reads Macchiavelli (you didn't think I wouldn't mention my daughter, did you? This is a quasi Mommy Blog (TM) after all.
No elaboration needed. Let's just say that she has mastered the dark art of manipulating people to do her every bidding. Also emotional blackmail. Example: If I scold her she runs to her Daddy, whilst making Bambi eyes and saying "Daaad-dyyy" in the most heartbreaking way imaginable. And vice versa if it's her father doing the scolding. If it's both of us, she'll just run to my Dad, who's idea of perfect grandfathering is catering to a kid's every whim.
Do kids come equipped with lessons from The Prince and Sun Tzu's Art of Suckering Adults embedded in their cunning little heads?
I think that's pretty much it for the moment. Look out for more online quizzes and/or memes!
nads went at 17:30